After the 2:1 Conference

A week and a half ago I did something that I hadn’t done in a very long time.

I spent an entire weekend away from my family.  

What a scary thought.  Seriously.  Because over the past few years my personal identity has become so wrapped up in teaching and caring for my children that I really had forgotten what it was

to just be me. 

Who am I?  Really?

So when an old friend emailed me a couple of months ago to say, “Let me send you to the 2:1 Conference,”  I almost said no.

I looked for a way to say no. 

I double, triple, and quadruple checked with my husband to see if maybe there was a scheduling conflict.

I rationalized about the cost of a hotel room and agonized over the thought of leaving my better half alone with our unpredictable crew.

I had visions of them living on soda crackers and tearing each other to pieces (don’t know why, since I don’t even know what soda crackers are…are they the same as saltines?).

I tried to say “no” and yet I knew deep down that my friend was being led to minister to me, and that it was my job to say “yes.”

I got my ticket, reserved a room, made a menu for the family and made sure they had all the necessary ingredients in the house (at least I knew they wouldn’t starve).

That didn’t stop me from worrying myself silly and convincing myself in the weeks leading up to it that it was all a horrible mistake.

I went.  And I’m so glad that I did.

There are so many things that spoke to me at 2:1, but I just want to talk about one thing right now.  The thing that makes me want to go again next year.

I’m a wallflower, y’all. 

I’m the quiet, reserved introvert, the one they always accused of being rude for not participating in the small talk before school.  Because I must be stuck up or something, right?

It’s not that I don’t like people.  I just don’t talk unless I’ve got something to talk about.  And I never quite know what to do with my face.  And then there’s that ADD thing.

So here I am, at this conference, full of people I’d never before met in real life.  I’ve met some of them online.  Read many of them.  But face-to-face is quite a different thing.  And I know I’m a weirdo.  I am. 

But I felt accepted in a way that I’ve never felt before (outside of my own family).  And I found myself freely conversing with people I was meeting for the first time about things I don’t normally talk about.  And it was ok. It was all good.

I  talked to people about Peter’s Ichthyosis and his sensory issues.  I talked about some of the learning challenges my kids have had.  I talked about my faith.  I talked about my blog.

And I didn’t feel judged.  Or rejected.  Or inferior.  Or any of those things.

Acceptance.  Love.  Support.  Understanding.  Yes, I did feel all of those things. 

I was right where I was supposed to be.

I met some wonderful ladies and I’m enjoying continuing our connections online.

As for what I learned, I’m still processing that.  Some changes are coming in me.  And I’m working on a couple of projects, too:

1. I’m going to be working with some other bloggers to put together something this month for Ichthyosis Awareness Month…more on that shortly.
2. I’m brainstorming something else (something extra special) that I’m hoping to share with you sometime in the next few weeks.

Have you ever attended a conference that really spoke to your heart?