Nothing like a difficult day to make you wake up and smell what you are doing wrong.
Yep, I’ve been doing it wrong. I do that a lot.
So, what went wrong?
- I didn’t get enough sleep last night because I was zoning out in front of the computer and babbling like a freak on FB. And so now I am staying up late babbling like a freak on my blog. Lack of sleep makes Mama cranky.
- When I did go to bed I wasted at least a half hour ruminating on some stupid article someone posted to FB, depriving me of even more sleep.
- This morning I woke Mary up before she was ready, because I wanted to make breakfast one time today. Never wake up a girl before she’s good and ready. Seriously.
- I sat blithely typing an email at the computer while Emma (age 2-3/4) disappeared into the kitchen. It seems she thought she would do some “cooking” on the stove. It’s ok, it just involved rattling mixing spoons in the dirty pans still sitting there.
- I let it get out that there were still some Nerds in the cabinet. Next time I decorate a cake with candy, I’m throwing out the rest of the candy. Then maybe I won’t be skating on it a month later and my kids won’t be hopped up on sugar and artificial food dyes.
- I promised that I would make donuts for “tea”. Never promise anything unless you are absolutely certain you can fulfill said promise (read: don’t promise to do it unless you are already doing it.) I didn’t get it done because of the Walmart mistake (see #8-10), so now I have to make them tomorrow.
- Again I didn’t pay close enough attention to Emma, and she decided to help herself to a drink of water. Did I ever tell you about the time she filled every single cup in the kitchen with water?
- I promised I would take the kiddos to Walmart on a SATURDAY (have I lost my mind entirely?) to spend their Valentine’s money their Grandma sent them. I planned to take them right after lunch (so everyone would still be energetic and not at all hungry and hopefully in a good mood), but somehow no matter how well I think I’ve got things in hand, it always takes at least an hour to get everyone finally strapped into their carseats, and by 2pm I wasn’t so sure I wanted to go anymore, but see #6.
- I took them to Walmart anyway, and, after driving through a brief snowstorm, found a parking space at least a mile from the door, braved the artic wind across the lot, and then spent 1-1/2 hours in that store. And half of that time was in the toy department.
- And then I did the worst thing I did all day…I pointed out 2 different toys that Peter could afford to buy with his money and he simply could not decide. By this time, of course, he was tired, his blood sugar had crashed, and his senses were totally overstimulated by all the people and the artificial lighting. And he had a total melt-down.
My only shining moment today was not losing it when Peter lost it in the Walmart.
Although a kind lady did stop to ask if I was ok. Maybe it wasn’t such a shining moment after all.
I just held him. Loved him. Tickled him a little (sometimes the extra stimulation helps him to change tracks).
The rest of the world wasn’t there. For once I wasn’t rushing him.
Until he came back to himself.
Maybe by the time they are grown and off on their own I’ll have this motherhood thing figured out.